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So, it’s time to leave to take the older boys to school. This morning I’m not even going to battle the twins to change out of their pj’s, we are not going anywhere today. That shaves off about 15 minutes of struggle and scream time getting out the door. So now everyone’s packed in the car ready to go, on time. Not five minutes into the drive than who decides to start wailing ear piercingly loud… Jordan!!! Araghhhh!!! I now had Tyson crying and hitting Jordan, which didn’t help the situation and my eldest son yelling for Jordan to shut up and Tyson to stop… Faaaarrrrrrkkkk!!! Had to keep my cool cause I was driving, my car is also not in the best condition and has been stalling in traffic on me, so I have to be cautious of this becoming a problem, I’m now yelling at my oldest son to tell him it’s pointless yelling at his little brother and he will be at school in 10 minutes, so just block it out best you can. I always tried to acknowledge calmly how everyone is feeling, but that can wear off quickly when it’s relentless. The hardest part is hoping, hoping that your child will turn to you and tell you exactly what the problem for them is… This is a sloooooowwww process that I can’t wait to have success with one day. I have a beautiful Son with a limb difference, I used to think, would it be easier if his difference was hidden, meaning I was worried about how the world would perceive him… The answer I know, or feel to that is no. An inside difference like Autism is far greater a challenge than a difference on the outside. An outside difference is what you see is what you get… Autism I am still struggling for answers….. Time for coffee number 2!!!

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